Tom: G G G7 I'm a shitty golfer, you can ask my wife C G I've been out there hackin' every day of my life C G I got the shorts and all the plaid sweaters A D D7 (drag the pick) and this new taylormade driver didn't make me any better G G7 Man, I hit 'em fat and I hit 'em thin C G I roll 'em in the bunker's man, I hit 'em again C G E Slice 'em in the bushes, crank 'em in a creek A D G I popped that sucker up and hooked it out on the street [Chorus] C G Yeah, I'm 245 right down the middle D G and I'll miss the green, to the left just a little C G Chili dip a wedge, and put it all together A D Hit that son of a bitch right up there in the leather C G E If you call that good, and let me press on the side A D G You can put me down for a five [Verse 2] G G7 Hey, I'm a shitty golfer, most of us are C G But we carry our clubs in the back of our cars C G E What else you gonna do when your out of town A D D7 and you need to waste a whole day and shoot another round G G7 Man, I played Augusta, and I played Pebble Beach C G and one time at Sawgrass I shot 83 C G E If I live long enough to be 88 A D G I think I'll celebrate it by shooting my age [Chorus] C G Yeah, I'm 245 right down the middle D G and I'll miss the green, to the left just a little C G Chili dip a wedge, and put it all together A D Hit that son of a bitch right up there in the leather C G E If you call that good, and let me press on the side A D G You can put me down for a five E A D G Oh yeah you can put me down for a five