This land is our land, this land is not your land
Fought for in bastogne and the solomon islands
Fought for at shiloh and in buses to birmingham
This land needs you now to secede
You went from slavery to jim crow segregation
From john birch lunacy to the aryan nations
Now it’s your tea party, the new infestation
Oh, this land needs you now to secede
You could have yourself a real theocracy
Purged of pagans and foreign philosophy
Cleansed of elites and meritocracy
Stripped of unions and socialist bureaucracy
You could teach creationism in your new confederacy
Explain the civil war as a fight for the rights of states
Hang the ten commandments on every courthouse door
And have bible law to adjudicate your fates
You’ll have a land that will not be made for me
Unlike this land that now needs you to secede
We’ll hang on to baseball, and you can have monopoly
We’ll go with science, and you’ll have your scriptures
We’ll run on light, right and common decency
And you’ll have your myths and superstitious strictures
We’ll take the constitution, and you’ll go with God
Stuffing him in a place where enlightenment don’t shine
Called upon to execute his intelligent design
You’ll love your land the way you never loved mine
For this land was not made for you and me
And this land needs you now to secede
In the land of a thousand private prisons and a million health insurance plans
You’ll be free of regulations and environmental bans
You’ll drill and dig up what you want and turn your rivers into swamps
And no nanny state progressos will stop you building dams
So secede now, please now, do it today!
Save yourself from babylon before you too turn gay
You won’t realize God’s promise in this land if you stay
And we can’t wait for the rapture to take you away
And with your genetic pool, oh how you will thrive!
You’ll be a sight to behold in but a few generations
A knuckle-dragging, bible-drooling, home-schooling tribe
In a truncated, dissipated, romper room nation
Assault-rifling woods reduced to rats, stumps and clutter
You’ll be living on the gospel and imported peanut butter
And in the brave new world you’ll have at your feet
You can even stick a cross on the flag, so come on, take the leap!
Get out of our union now and make your very own state
We need you to take a bow for america to be great
This land was not made for you, it’s not what you need
And this land needs you now to secede
