I wrote a letter to the President I said "Hey man your money's better spent Trying to bring back Ms. Monroe for me Before I get too old for her" Wouldn't you know I got a letter back He said "We got doctors in the lab Trying to bring back Ms. Monroe for you Before you get too old for her" Well, well and the very next day I got a package in the mail Low and behold and there she was And I fell in love with her But she was exactly like a doll She didn't feel anything at all She ain't got no heart and soul She ain't got no no She ain't got no no Ain't got no Got no heart and soul I sent the girl back to D.C. So I could get some peace and I don't know if she's happy there But I can't say I really care at all Oh yeah, and one other thing I sent the President a letter back I said "Tell your doctors in the lab Next time you take this poor girl apart Be sure to replace her heart Because she's exactly like a doll She don't feel anything at all" Next day I was watching TV Low and behold but who should I see It was none other than you know who Singin' "Happy birthday Mr. President Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you"