Tom: E E [Verse 1] E I'm not so bad once you get to know me E once you get down on your knees and blow me A I'm from Missouri, you should show me E water me, you could grow me B7 E don't you ever snow me or I'll hunt you down [Chorus] E I'm a walking happy hour E I'm a happier than a happy hour A I'm a happier hour E Oh yeah B7 E I am pretty sweet but I am mostly sour [Verse 2] E I'd be pleased to meet you anywhere E anywhere where eagles dare A I could be a strike or be a spare E Fully clothed or underwear B7 E You can pound on me like a gypsy snare [Verse 3] E The sky is blue and then its black E I can stretch my dick below my sack A You could call me Steve you could call me E Jack B7 E If you soak your teeth in coke they will turn black [Verse 4] E I'm crispy like a tator tot E my nose is stuffed up full of snot A my heaters on I'm running hot E for you I'm just an after thought B7 E If I give you cash perhaps you could be bought [Verse 5] E It's Christmas time for you and me E lets curl up underneath the tree A I'll tie you by the TV E I stole from Walmart, it was free B7 E If the cops come knocking act that your asleep [Verse 6] E You could be yourself in my double wide E You don't everr have to hide A The only food I eat is fried E I watched Brokeback Mountain then I cried B7 E I feel at home with you when I'm inside ....you [Verse 7] E I smoke Newport, you smoke Cool E Honeynut Cheerios is my only rule A Like Omar on the Wire, I'm no E fool B7 E Did I ever tell you I wrote a hit with Jewel [Verse 8] E I was truly meant for you and E you were truly meant for me A lets go camping by the sea E you can climb my flagpole golly gee B7 E We go together just like poop and pee [Verse 9] E I break the yolks make a smily face E with my PJs on I'm so out of place A I'm a visitor from E outerspace B7 E you can rub your DNA apon my face [Verse 10] E I clip my toenails by the sink E well you just sip that pretty drink A Ignore the brown trod it doth stink E with the casing on the sausage link B7 E we were made for one another don't you think [Verse 11] N.C. Come to San Diego town N.C. We got re-fried beans so golden brown N.C. We kicked out all the mimes and clowns E Everyone smiles and no one frowns B7 E We got extra verbs and lots of vowels and nouns [Verse 12] E I'm not so bad once you get to know me E once you get down on your knees and blow me A I'm from Missouri, you should show me E water me, you could grow me B7 E don't you ever snow me or I'll hunt you down [Outro] E I'll hunt you down E I'll hunt you down E I'll hunt you down