Ms. Lovett: Seems a downright shame... Todd (spoken): Shame? Ms. Lovett: Seems an awful waste... Such a nice plump frame Wots his name has Had...has... Nor he can't be traced Business needs a lift Debts to be erased Think of it as thrift, as a gift If you get my drift Seems and awful waste I mean... With the price of meat wot it is When you get it, if you get it Todd: Ah... Ms. Lovett: Good you got it Take for instance ms. Mooney and her pie shop Business never better using only pussy cats and toast Now a pussy's good for maybe six or seven at the most And I'm sure they can't compare as far as taste (Simultaneously) Todd: Ms. Lovett, what a charming notion Eminently practical Ms. Lovett: Well it does seem a waste! Todd: And yet appropriate as always Ms. Lovett, how I've lived without you all these years I'll never know! How delectable! Also undetectable! Ms. Lovett: Think about it Lots of other gentlemen'll soon be coming in for a shave Won't they? Think of All them Pies! Todd: How choice! How rare! For what's the sound of the world out there? Ms. Lovett: What mr. Todd, what mr. todd What is that sound? Todd: Those crunching noises pervading the air! Ms. Lovett: Yes, mr. Todd, yes mr. todd Yes all around Todd: It's man devouring man, my dear! Both: Then who are we to deny it in here? Todd (spoken): These are desperate times, ms. Lovett And desperate measures are called for Ms. Lovett: Here we are. Hot out of the oven Todd: What is that? Ms. Lovett: Its priest Have a little priest Todd: Is it really good? Ms. Lovett: Sir, it's too good, at least Then again they don't commit sins of the flesh So it's pretty fresh Todd: Awful lot of fat Ms. Lovett: Only where it sat Todd: Haven't you got poet or something like that? Ms. Lovett: No you see the trouble with poet Is how do you know it's deceased? Try the priest! Lawyer's rather nice Todd: If it's for a price Ms. Lovett: Order something else, though, to follow Since no one should swallow it twice Todd: Anything that's lean? Ms. Lovett: Well then if you're british and loyal You might enjoy royal marine Anyway it's clean Though of course it tastes of wherever it's been! Todd: Is that squire on the fire? Ms. Lovett: Mercy no, sir, look closer You'll notice its grocer! Todd: Looks thicker, more like vicar Ms. Lovett: No, it has to be grocer It's green! Todd: The history of the world, my love Ms. Lovett: Save a lot of graves Do a lot of relatives favors Todd: Is those below serving those up above! Ms. Lovett: Everybody shaves so there should be plenty of flavors Todd: How gratifying for once to know Both: That those above will serve those down below Todd (spoken): What is that? Ms. Lovett: It's fop Finest in the shop Or we have some shepherds pie peppered With actual shepherd on top! And I've just begun Is the politician so oily it's served with a doily? Have one! Todd: Put it on a bun Well you never know if it's going to run! Ms. Lovett: Try the friar! Fried, it's drier! Todd: No! The clergy is really too coarse and too mealy! Ms. Lovett: Then actor! It's compacter! Todd: Ah, but always arrives overdone (Spoken) I'll come again when you have judge on the menu Have charity towards the world, my pet! Ms. Lovett: Yes, yes, I know, my love Todd: We'll take the customers that we can get! Ms. Lovett: High-born and low, my love! Todd: We'll not discriminate great from small No, we'll serve anyone (Simultaneously) Ms. Lovett: We'll serve anyone! Todd: Meaning anyone! Both: And to anyone At all!