Tom: C
C
Yeah, I lef' home when the kid was three.
F
It sure felt good to be fancy free
G C
Tho I knew it wasn't quite the fatherly thing to do.
C
But that kid kept screamin' and throwin' up
F
And pissin' in his pants til I had enough
G C
So just for revenge I went and named him Sue.
[Verse 2]
C
Yeah it was Gatlinburg in mid July
F
I was gettin' drunk and gettin' by
G C
Gettin' old and goin' from bad to worse
C
When thru the door with an awful scream
F
comes the ugliest queen I've ever seen
G
He says Hi, my name is Sue how do you do?
C
then he hit me with his purse
[Verse 3]
C
Now this ain't the way he tells the tale
F
but he scratched my face with his fingernails
G C
And then he bit my thumb and kicked me with his high-heeled shoe (I can be a tiger)
C
I punched him in the nose and he started to cry
F
and he threw some perfume in my eye
G C
And it sure ain't easy fightin' with a boy named Sue (I can be an animal)
[Verse 4]
C
I whacked him in the head with a table and a chair
F
And he screamed hey dad you messed my hair
G C
And he kicked me in the navel and knocked out a piece of my lint
C
He was spittin' blood I was spittin' teeth
F
And we crashed through the wall and out into the street
G C
A kickin' and gougin' in the mud and the blood and his creme de menthe
[Verse 5]
C
Then out of his panties he pulls a gun
F
I'm about to get shot by my very own son
G C
He's screamin' 'bout Sigmund Freud and lookin' grim (I have problems)
C
So I thought fast and I told him some stuff
F
How I named him Sue just to make him tough
G C
And I guess he bought it 'cause now I'm livin' with him
[Verse 6]
C
Yeah he cooks and sews and cleans up the place
F
he cuts my hair and shaves my face
G C
And irons my shirts better than a daughter could do (I'm so domestic)
C
And on the nights that I can't score
F
well I can't tell you anymore
G C
Sure is a joy to have a boy like Sue
[Outro]
G C
yeeeah a son is fun but it's a real joy with Sue (that hurts dad)
