Good evening one and all, this is channel 24 Bringing you the latest news around the world Down in Florida today, someone tried to get away When he commandeered the train at Disney World Until noon it was a standoff, but then he lost his luck When someone shot him down, dressed up like Donald Duck It was a midget G-man And we're sorry that we could not show it live But we'll have film of the shooting here at five Give me some news I can use, let me smile for a while For the madness has taken it's toll Give me some news I can use, just a break for the sake Of my mind which is losing control From Washington today, called a senator to say That our future has been cancelled 'cause we're broke We called the white house without end finally reached the President Says he don't know if it's real or just a joke And last night at the playoffs, things got pretty grim They crucified the referee and tore him limb from limb Ah, you should have been there And in the weather, there's a hurricane in sight And that's the way it is with us tonight Give me some news I can use, let me smile for a while For the madness has taken it's toll Give me some news I can use, just a break for the sake Of my mind which is losing control Seems like every single day another mind gets blown away And the world goes just a little more insane I got problems of my own, tryin' to keep my house and home And I sure could stand some cheerful news again My agent called to tell me my record's on the chart It's number 90 with an anchor, I never said that it was art I gotta eat too, ya know And my buddy who still owes me for his bail He says, don't worry, your check is in the mail Give me some news I can use, let me smile for a while For the madness has taken it's toll Give me some news I can use, just a break for the sake Of my mind which is losing control