Jack La Lanne

Blame it on La Lanne
When something goes wrong
That sweatsuited scapegoat
For the exercising bomb He's our man
My lawn turned yellow
My goldfish died
I squirted some Ben-Gay
Right in my eye
He's the fucking cause
That sweatsuited scapegoat
With the atomic sock
When he exercises me
I know he doesn't shower
When I see him beatin' meat
He makes me want to shower