When you start your journey, you go and meet your driver You shake his hand, and hope he's feeling well The things to come may be somewhat unfamiliar Like eating herring where the sun does not go down Our driver calculates what time we'll hit town And every time a border comes We go inside and meet with someone Perhaps a form will need to be filled in Then we can go and restart up the engines Plumbing often varies in the various different countries I like to crouch down and turn on those bidets I'll have a cocktail, pick at my fingernails And then I'll squat down for a wash to end the day Our driver recommends we try the souffle And every time a border comes We go inside and meet with someone Perhaps a form will need to be filled in Then we can go and restart up the engines Then we went down under, and we were told of farmers Who brought some pigs here from the old country But pigs eat turtle eggs and turtles eat jellyfish And now you get stung if you're swimming in the sea Our driver gestures out behind the palm trees And every time a border comes We go inside and meet with someone Perhaps a form will need to be filled in Then we can go and restart up the engines