These are the most uncomfortable things a girl can talk about These are the most uncomfortable things a girl can talk about One I want to be a boy Though not sure that I would like those giant Feet I would be overjoyed Because this penis envy has me hurting Help me oh be one I'm yearning These are the most uncomfortable things a girl can talk about These are the most uncomfortable things a girl can talk about Two I had to pluck my chin It really freaked me out I was only twenty-six And this one did me in The body hairs in strange places Sent my boyfriend to the races These are the most uncomfortable things a girl can talk about These are the most uncomfortable things a girl can talk about Three This one's embarrassing I should have worn a darker color than I did And then I paid the price And on that day to my demise The white I wore was not so white These are the most uncomfortable things a girl can talk about These are the most uncomfortable things a girl can talk about