She lost one to pneumonia, gave the other to prison and now she spends mother's day sitting in her kitchen Looking at the pictures of her past felt surreal She had a couple of people, some friends that helped her heal But days like today, she doesn't want to be a bother and as far as she's concerned, them boys didn't have a father Nuh uh, she had to teach 'em the ways Teach 'em how to behave, be brave and even how to shave Some days it makes her feel like a soldier and other times it makes her feel like a failure Why did the stronger one die from a cold, huh? Why did the smarter one end up in jail? Nah She gave them boys everything that she could Two full-time jobs to keep 'em in a good neighborhood They understood how to love and how to live Now she doesn't understand how it comes down to this Maybe she should go work in her yard and take her mind off the past and try to let the days start But she's waiting on one of those annual calls while she's looking at the photos on her hallway walls His big sibling died, and mom's by herself and now he spends every day inside of that cell Looking at the photos of his past makes him crash So he never takes 'em out that folder under his mattress Days like today he doesn't think about what happened, no Still gotta call mommy, wish her a happy one Uh huh, mom, if only she'd had been around Maybe big brother would still be living now Some days it makes him feel like a traitor and other times it makes him feel like a martyr Seems like some displacement of anger Seems like he blames her more than his father She was gone all the time at work Never around to play the part of the police or the nurse She understood how things fall apart So why'd she let the nest hit the ground this hard? Well maybe he should go walk in the yard and take his mind off the past and try to let the days start Cause it's so difficult to admit it's his fault when he's looking at the faces in his hallway walls