When a fellow needs a little helping hand Who'll be there? It's almost guaranteed No one else could ever really understand Only another man knows what you need And when a man has fallen down upon his knees In such a moment who'd be better than Someone who's self-controlled Someone who's strong and bold Someone as good as gold It's better with a man Better with a man Then you agree, my friend? Indeed, I do! When a man is lonely he can always find Another man who's feeling just the same Drink will help you get your troubles off your mind You'll both be blind before you know his name And in that rousing climax when your horse comes in Who will cheer as loudly as he can? Only a man can see The meaning of victory Oh, the camaraderie It's better with a man HENRY It's better with a man MONTY Women have much to recommend HENRY Women have much to recommend Lord knows I've had my share HENRY & MONTY But when a fellow needs a friend HENRY That's a totally different affair MONTY Women are soft against your skin They're awfully nice to nestle with HENRY But when the sport is masculine- HENRY & MONTY You need a man to wrestle with! HENRY Gentlemen have secrets they will never tell MONTY Gentlemen have secrets they will never tell HENRY No, they will never tell HENRY & MONTY They'll never tell their wives HENRY Married men know there are things you must not say HENRY & MONTY Discretion is the only way That love survives HENRY Men are always there MONTY Men are always there HENRY Always there to share MONTY Always there to share And take good care As mates and brothers HENRY Nothing can compare For instance HENRY & MONTY Take a look at us It's been ever thus Since boarding school began HENRY Women are too complex MONTY Women too often vex HENRY & MONTY Men are a simpler sex HENRY It's better with a man MONTY Better with a man HENRY Better with a man HENRY & MONTY Better with a man! (Spoken) Bottoms up!