I find myself coming back to old habits
Self-destruction pulls me in
It breathes new life for a few seconds
Then quickly makes you feel like you're drowning
But that brief moment is what's addicting
That causes you to relapse
Time stops for a minute
And you feel freed from things in your past
And you're not thinking of the aftermath
You're looking to escape
Anything to get away
I know it well and I wish didn't, I wish didn't
Over time I became co dependent
To the feeling of feeling nothing
To a substance that one day might kill me
And maybe one day I might care
Being broken is the second nature
And I'm no stranger to feeling empty
And lonely in my twenties
Although my wounds have healed
That pain still sticks, and anything can trigger it
I'm still a fucking mess
Why do we rush into this?
Why do we say it'll get better if it doesn't?
'Cause it hasn't
Hanging at my funeral
Didn't think it was my time to go
Guess I'll die alone
Thinking about the hurt
Burn it, burn it, burn it, I don't even want it anymore
Tired of this curse
The ones you love will always leave
Dying in the flame
The ones you love will always leave
Buried me while I sleep
