I'll tell you a story that happened to me One day as I went down to Youghal by the sea The Sun it was bright and the day is was warm Says I an auld pint woudn't do me no harm I went in an I called for a bottle of stout Says the barman I'm sorry the beer is sould out Try whiskey or Paddy ten years in the wood Says I I'll try cider I've heard that it's good O never, O never, O never again If I live to hundred or a hundred and ten I fell to the floor and I coudn't get up After drinking a pint of old Jaysus Jump Up After drinkin' a quart I went out to the yard Where I met up with Brophy the big local guard Come here to me boy don't you know I'm the law Well, I up with me fist and I shattered his jaw We fell to the floor and we couldn't get up But it wasn't me kissed his t'was the Jaysus Jump up And the next thing I met down in Youghal by the sea Was a poor man on crutches and says he to me O never, O never, O never again If I live to hundred or a hundred and ten I fell to the floor and I coudn't get up After drinking a pint of old Jaysus Jump Up I'm afraid of me life I'll be hit by a car Won't you help me across to the Celtic Knot Bar? After downing a quart of that cider so sweet He threw down his crutches and danced on his feet I heard of a lad who forgot his own name He was clever when younger, the locals explained His name is was Fagan, he'd swear it was Flynn That Jaysus Jump Up fairly done his head in O never, O never, O never again If I live to hundred or a hundred and ten I fell to the floor and I coudn't get up After drinking a pint of old Jaysus Jump Up So if ever you go down to Youghal by the sea Stay out of the pub and please take it from me If you want to stay sane don't you dare take a sup Of that devil drink cider called Jaysus Jump Up O never, O never, O never again If I live to hundred or a hundred and ten I fell to the floor and I coudn't get up After drinking a pint of old Jaysus Jump Up