Tom: Gm Gm Cm Gm D Gm Cm Gm D [Verse 1] Gm Cm There's a cozy little place tucked away Gm D Between the third and fourth circles of Hell Gm Cm Where you can take a break, makes a great vacation Gm D Maybe take in just a little damnation as well Gm So ring the bell Cm We're excited to welcome you in Gm D No time here to dwell on your sins Gm Your itinerary's fairly heavily perilous Cm But let me share the various Gm D Amenities you're getting within Gm If you've got luggage Cm The staff can take it through Gm D But the baggage that's emotional, well that can stay with you Gm Cm You've clearly packed a bag with plans to stay a day or two Gm D But it's pretty optimistic if you think you won't be Gm Cm Strewn across the floor, twisted and deformed Gm D Little bits of blood and gore, chewed and spit out of the maw Gm Cm Of a vicious set of jaws in a spiffy uniform Gm All your sins have a cost Dm But your death is complimentary, of course [Chorus] Gm Cm It's just monkey business Gm D But with one key difference Gm Cm That the one reliving it Gm D Is beyond deliverance Gm Cm We've got one piece hidden in Gm D Deep amongst these remnants Gm Cm Of our one-time residents Gm D In our little hotel in Hell Gm Where the bellhops bite [Verse 2] Cm We're afraid to say that the pool is closed Gm D Since the lifeguard started to decompose Gm Cm Down here things lurk deep below Gm D So stay clear if you want to keep your toes Gm Cm Breakfast is served till ten Gm D but no one ever wakes up to attend Gm Cm 'Cause if you lay your head on a bed, you'll be too dead for eggs Gm D And you'll never eat bacon again Gm Cm Our gymnasium's stocked with the best utensils Gm D Though you ought to be running without the treadmill Gm Cm The bar's a haunt, with all the spirits you want Gm D They were all our last guests to get killed Gm Cm We've so many amenities, no chance of boredom Gm D We both know you've already seen the ballroom Gm Cm A little reminder, you've a riddle to find Gm D Or it is frivolous fighting your doom [Chorus] Gm Cm It's just monkey business Gm D But with one key difference Gm Cm That the one reliving it Gm D Is beyond deliverance Gm Cm We've got one piece hidden in Gm D Deep amongst these remnants Gm Cm Of our one-time residents Gm D In our little hotel in Hell Gm Where the bellhops bite [Verse 3] Cm Think twice before you use that phone by the bed Gm D Room service will cost you an arm and a leg Gm And a torso, a stomach Cm a neck and a head Gm D The menu's sparse, but the staff's well-fed Gm Cm We'll provide a device that might help you find the Gm D Shards you've been tasked with and hide from the nightmares Gm Cm Gm But if you try to check the TripAdvisor, you'll likely trip and die, sir D G "Five stars, never a survivor!" Cm Gm We're not winding you up, we're not letting you go D Gm Fish the mint from the blood pooling in the pillows Cm Gm Checkout is at one, not that you'll need to know D Gm Pay your tab at the front desk, or death will be slow Cm Gm We strongly urge that you defer your day's ablutions D Gm The concierge will start the purge before you're through them Cm Gm Whilst on your journey on the way to retribution D We hope that you enjoy your stay of execution [Chorus] Gm Cm It's just monkey business Gm D But with one key difference Gm Cm That the one reliving it Gm D Is beyond deliverance Gm Cm We've got one piece hidden in Gm D Deep amongst these remnants Gm Cm Of our one-time residents Gm D In our little hotel in Hell Gm Where the bellhops bite