The Chief Constable's missus Flat out on the floor With her legs in the air And her head out the door. But I'd best not tell you What she said, what I saw But it sure beats the telly And it's better than war. There's a pub on the corner "Ye Old Lost & Found" So let your feet wander And follow me round. The pumps are full of magic The barmaid's real hot You can find what you're longing for Lose what you're not. There's a pub on the corner "Ye Old Lost & Found" And tonight, tonight You can fly and not drown. I've planned a revolution I've nearly gone mad I've sold all that's dear But the beer's never bad. I've took off me clothes And I've broken me nose, I've sung till they've booted me Back to the "Rose" CHORUS I've had sex in the car park Tears in the bogs And the other way round Coming back from the dogs. I've kissed a hundred ugly barmaids Lost two hundred fights But I regret nothing …Until it is light. Take my hand Hold me up Push me home Find my key. I don't know you But I love you Come all live with me… There's a pub on the corner "Ye Old Lost & Found" So let your feet wander And follow me round. The pumps are full of magic The barmaid's real hot You can find what you're longing for Lose what you're not. There's a pub on the corner "Ye Old Lost & Found" And tonight, tonight You can fly and not drown.