Air-con set to sub-arctic If it moves it isn't quick Major delays, cancellations Tedious conversation Trying to eat your dinner with an ass in your face It's a disgrace It's a journey into pure despair There are fucking assholes everywhere I can smell piss and shit in the air Fuck you, southern trains We're not getting anywhere Journey into pure despair I just wanna get somewhere Throw away the itinerary The whole rat race in one place, stationary On your marks, get set, stop Southern trains are top (uhh) It's a journey into pure despair There are fucking assholes everywhere I can smell piss and shit in the air Fuck you, southern trains We're not getting anywhere Them southern trains Choo-choo! Boo-hoo! Yeah! Them southern trains Choo-choo! Boo-hoo! Heaving carriages of indignation Grown men weeping in pure frustration Totally packed and always late Into the tunnel of hate It's a journey into pure despair (Got me on the rails) There are fucking assholes everywhere (It's a steam age nightmare) I can smell piss and shit in the air (Slower than snails) Fuck you, southern trains We're not getting anywhere