Tom: Bm
D Em Bm
Bm A
Good evenning everybody, welcome to the show
E B
Before we begin with the comedy, there's something that you need to know.
Bm A
Things are a little different, since the last time we were here.
E
One of us has gone through some changes,
Bm
might be strange but there's nothing to fear
[Break]
D
So it's time to address the rumour,
E
Do with a sense of humour
G F#
So there's no mistaking an identity for a costume...
N.C. Em Bm
We think it's best to point out the elephant in the room!
Bm into a pause
[Chorus]
D A
Yes Lee is bald, he's a bald man with a bald head
G Dm
Yes Lee is bald, the man with hair you once knew is dead
D F#m
He wasn't bald before, but now he is bald
G
How strange, how odd, how queer
F#
Lee is bald
[Verse 2]
B A
Ever since he was a child, Lee's been thoroughly aware
E B
That he's been a bald man all along, trapped inside a man with hair
A
Now he has come to grips, with his identity
E F#
He is whole, he is secure, he is happy, he is free!
[Chorus]
D A
Yes Lee is bald, just take a look at that head
G Dm
Yes Lee is bald, shiny and pointy like an egg
D F#
He's kicking ass with his bare head, how strange, how odd, how queer
G F#
Yes Lee is bald, Lee is bald!
[Dialogue]
Bm A
Hey Lee, now that you're bald is your voice gonna change?
E
No!
Bm
Hey now that you're bald which bathroom do you use?
B
I use the bald men's bathroom
A
Lee, now that you've got no hair on your head, does that mean you like guys now?
E Bm
Well androgenetic alopecia has nothing to do with sexual preference
A
How long is it gonna take until you're fully bald?
E
Great question, and you know what? I'm not even sure
B Bm
But I lost a few more hairs this morning so this isn't even my final form
A
Hey Lee, now that you're bald are you gonna cut your dick off?
E G
None of your fucking business, none of your fucking business
D# D#m A#
Yes I am bald, he's proud and he is fierce
G#m D#
Yes I am bald, I am bald, look at my head
G
If you've got a problem, then fuck off outta here!
G#m G#
Bald, I am bald
[Simeoultaenous]
G
I am bald
Lee is bald
C
Oh and also Jordan's a woman now
