What the hell's that on your top lip? Whatever it is it looks like shit In an age of man with teenage hair And every girl avoids your stair Antisocial facial hair shave your face Antisocial facial hair male disgrace Don't be bold don't be brash Just shave off that antisocial tash Months of growing you can't even bic it Go to plan b and get the cat to lick it Women laugh in your face they don't want a snide They want a real man like Magnum PI No dad hormones he's to blame Rem Russ Broomo bow in shame Kevin webster from dead stop When you cough your slug falls off Hang up your boots There's nothing you can do Face the facts you're screwed Gluing pubes to your face last chance saloon Only one thing left to do And that's thrash Thrash with a small moustache