For may years standing, my assembly with you, is reliable, a permanent comfort, bliss and safe-conduct. So oddly near, that your presence is hardly invisible to me. And that I know your voice like the beatings of my own heart. I often thought that I could call you by your name, but you changed, you touched me in another way. You left me. I left you... aghasted. And I am craving for solitude again, and again, and... My shell cracks and I leak, morphine enters, consciousness expands. In deft taints, enchantment, spellbound, miserysystem. Morphine made a man and the dope made him a king, but he is but a wanderer in the opium fields. Never I saw, but as sure as you see me, I know your place is captured by an other. And I touched god in an indecent way, my will is gone, thy kingdom cum.