Tom: Am C C [Verse] C Em/B Christmas really freaks me out. It makes me feel alone. Am A I think that elves are creepy. I'm not a fan of snow. Dm G C Fm G Forgive me when I say that Christmas is a bitch. C Em/B Chocolate makes my skin breakout. I don't like decorations. Am A I'm sick of all these cheesy songs that play on every station. Dm G C E I think it's all so whack, but people seem to disagree. [Chorus] Am Em The kids wait up for Santa Claus, the man with overalls. F F C/E He eats their milk and cookies, must have high cholesterol. Dm G C E But who am I to judge? This guy is not even real. Am Em Cause mistletoe and candy canes, all of its so freaking lame. F C/E Dm Sorry if I sound insane. C F Fm Christmas sweaters make me itch, decorations always glitch, C Fm G that's why Christmas is a bitch. [Verse] C Em/B There's people shopping at the mall for phones and big TV's, Am A wasting all their money on lights and Christmas trees, Dm G C Fm G making corporations rich, that's why Christmas is a bitch. C E And every time I look around, I see a smiling face, Am Am/G F is this a problem just with me or the human race? F G All of these really annoying songs that people love to sing. C E What can I possibly be missing from this Christmas thing? [Chorus] Am Em Kids wait up for Santa Claus, a weird dude with overalls. F F C/E He eats their milk and cookies, this guy has gotta have high cholesterol. Dm G But it makes people happy, it makes no sense to me. C E It's a fat guy who breaks into your house. It's bullshit. Am Em There's mistletoe and candy canes, I find all of this shit so lame. F C/E Dm I don't like playing cheerful games. C F Fm If only I could flip a switch, it's a complicated sitch, C G that's why Christmas is a bitch. [Outro] F G These stupid sweaters make me itch, decorations always glitch, C that's why Christmas is a bitch.