Tom: Em G D G La da da da, la da da da, la da da daaa, D B La da da da da da da [Verse 1] G C I was gonna steal a car but I'm white D G I was gonna steal it and drive real far but I'm white G C Now I gotta walk around and I know why (why man?) yea heyy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B (La da da da da da da) [Verse 2] G C I was gonna break in your house but I'm white D G I was gonna take your TV and your couch but I'm white G C Now I'm shoppin' at IKEA and I know why, (why man?) yea heyy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B (La da da da da da da) [Verse 3] G C I was gonna run from the cops but I'm white D G I was gonna run when they told me to stop but I'm white G C Now I got a jaywalkin' ticket and I know why (why man?) yea heayy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B (La da da da da da da) [Verse 4] G C I was gonna smoke some crack but I'm white (shit!) D G I was gonna throw my life off track but I'm white G C Now I gotta go to college and I know why (why man?) yea heayy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B (La da da da da da da) [Verse 5] G C I was gonna shoot some thugs (bam!) but I'm white (wassup sucka?) D G I was gonna kill them and take they drugs but I'm white (yeah wassup?) G C Now I'm payin' for their food stamps and I know why (why man?) yea heayy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B (La da da da da da da) [Verse 6] G C I was drink some Sprite but I'm white D G A little malt liquor woulda also been tight but I'm white G C Now I'm sippin' mocha lattes with soy on the side, yea heyy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B (La da da da da da da) [Verse 7] G C I was gonna rob a bank but I'm white D G Was gonna take the money bag and say thanks but I'm white G C Now I gotta work on Wall Street and I know why (why nigga?) yea heyy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B (La da da da da da da) [Verse 8] G C I got me a real good life 'cause I'm white D G I got me a house, dog, kids and wife 'cause I'm white G C I could retire when I'm 40 and I'll know why (why man?) yea heyy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B (La da da da da da da) [Verse 9] G C I'm wrote this song of mine 'cause I'm white (I'm white!) D G They gonna call me racist online 'cause I'm white (That's racist!) G C And if a black guy beat my ass up I know why (why man?) yea heyy, G D G Because I'm white, Because I'm white, Because I'm white D B G (La da da da da da da daaa) [Spoken] N.C. Yo, man! You tried that new Greek yogurt? N.C. That organic shit, it's good shit man N.C. I can't wait to invite over them new neighbors man N.C. Give 'em some kale chips N.C. You know what I'm sayin', that non-dairy non-fat skim N.C. Oh man, I just got that new Prius man N.C. You see that shit? N.C. Oh yeah, I was just at the proctologist, dawg (wassat?) N.C. That's a doctor for your asshole N.C. I been payin' into my 401k N.C. Payin' my taxes and shit N.C. Fuckin' IRS got me on audit N.C. You catch them CMAs? N.C. I got this new washin' machine too N.C. High efficiency nigga!