Richard Thompson

March of the cosmetic surgeons

Richard Thompson


Act 1, Scene 2, The Clinic of Dr. Krikstein. On a podium, Center, 
MRS. RIPSTOCK-GEDDES is posing as Aphrodite, complete with water jug. 
Enter Left DR. KRIKSTEIN, followed by his STUDENTS, marching Indian 
file to the rhythm of the music 

We nip and tuck, and we nip and tuck 
And we nip and tuck, and we nip and tuck 
And we nip and tuck all day 
We liposuck, and we liposuck 
And we liposuck, and we liposuck, 
And we liposuck all day 

Goddess, you are a goddess, 
You are a legend, you are a monument 
Goddess, you are a goddess, 
You are bewitching, you are embodiment 
Gone, tired and worn 
See woman new born 
See how the knife can free her 
Who wouldn't want to be her 
See her, see her 

Once I was old, ugly I was told 
Till that blessed day when I met Dr. Krikstein 
Now my thighs are firm and thin, 
No rolls beneath my chin 
And my nose is an ode composed 
By the blade of Dr. Krikstein 
Dr. Krikstein 

"Oh Doctor, what're you going to do with that?" 
"Don't worry, my liebe, thass is just the latest rhinoplastic technology. 
Just relax, it might hurt a teeny-weeny bit, uh!" 
"Ohhhhhhh, oooooooh, ooooh" 

We nip and tuck, and we nip and tuck 
And we nip and tuck, and we nip and tuck 
And we nip and tuck all day 
We liposuck, and we liposuck 
And we liposuck, and we liposuck, 
And we liposuck all day 

We stretch and snip, and we stretch and snip 
And we stretch and snip, and we stretch and snip 
And we stretch and snip all day 
We hack and gouge, and we hack and gouge 
And we hack and gouge, and we hack and gouge 
And we hack and gouge all day 

We nip and tuck, and we nip and tuck 
And we nip and tuck, and we nip and tuck 
And we nip and tuck all day 
We liposuck, and we liposuck 
And we liposuck, and we liposuck, 
And we liposuck all day