I got this email in my inbox early one Monday morning Asking me if I was free and available for performing When I saw where I could barely contain my glee “The Isle of Wight Festival”? I was like “Yes please” We get our set time and it’s 4:45 But 2 hours before is when we’re told to arrive According to Satnav it’s a 3hr drive So if we leave at 9, everything should be fine But yo, tragedy occurred from the moment we left The traffic was a mess and every single light was red Now we’re stuck behind a learner moving at a slow pace If he doesn’t move soon I’ma commit road rage But finally we get to the port all hot and sweaty With 2 minutes to go to get on board our ferry But it’s at that point we realise our mistake We’re at the wrong one and ours is 3 miles away That’s when I get on the phone to the organisers And I’m like “Guys, we’re still our way But there’s been a delay So whatever you do, please just” Hold On – I’m coming So now we’re racing across town to reach the other port Our tickets have expired so we’ve had to buy some more But I don’t even care we just need to get there quickly Coz if we miss our set neither of us will forgive me The next ferry isn’t until twenty to 4 Which gives us just over an hour till we need to perform The journey itself is only 20 minutes in duration It’s cutting it pretty fine, but we might just make it The car park is in a shopping centre that’s adjacent But it’s Saturday so naturally every space is taken We dump the car and now we’re struggling to find our way round I look at Cal who’s on the verge of nervous breakdown It’s no wonder that we can’t find our destination I mean, who puts a port inside a train station?! But finally we find it and we get on the boat We’re not home free but I refuse to give up hope That’s when Cal’s like “How are we getting there once we arrive?” And I’m like “What do you mean?” He’s like “You do know the whole island isn’t a festival yeah?” And I’m like uhh yeah? Hold On – I’m coming 20 minutes later and we’re on the other side Time is really of the essence coz we’re on in 45 We try to grab a taxi but there isn’t one in sight Kind of ironic really for a place that’s called ‘Ryde’ Eventually we get one and we chuck our stuff in it And the driver says the journey’s about 25 minutes I’m staring at the clock now watching the seconds ticking Our set’s in half an hour, please God don’t let us miss it He drops us off outside and we run to get our wristbands Then try to find our stage coz we ain’t got time for chit chat But the crowd is thick with people partying and drinking And everybody that we ask tells us something different We get there at 4:44 on the dot – Praying that we haven’t missed our slot We find the stage manager who’s the one in charge and has the power Who says “Nah, you boys aren’t on for another hour” That’s when me and Cal look at each other… And to be honest, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry But you know what? It doesn’t matter man Coz either way… We made it! Hold On – I’m coming