I want to be a playboy's bunny I'd do whatever they asked me to I'd meet people with lots of money And they would love me Like I loved you I want to be a topless waitress I want my mother to shed one tear I'd throw away this old sedate dress Slip into something a tad more sheer I want to be an artists' model An odalisque, au naturel I should be good at spin-the-bottle While I've still got something Left to sell I want to be a cobra dancer With Little Willy between my thighs I may not find a cure for cancer But I'll meet plenty of single guys I want to be a brothel worker I've always been treated like one If I could be a back-street lurker I'd make more money And have more fun I want to be a dominatrix Which isn't like me, but I can dream Learn S, and M, And all those gay tricks And men will pay me to Make them scream I want to be a porno starlet (For that I'll wait till Mama's dead) I'll see my name in lights of scarlet And get to spend every day in bed I want to be a tattooed lady Dedicated, as I am, to art Characters bold, complex and shady will write my memoirs Across my heart.