Lazyboy

We Only Read The Headlines

Lazyboy


You can cut to the chase 
And you know its okay 
Coz we only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines 

Baby get to the point 
And quit the full play 
We only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines anyways 

54% of bank robberies take place on a Friday 
Women blink nearly twice as much as men 
Elvis never ever gave an encore 
The number of wars fought between countries 
That both have at least one McDonalds is zero 
Every 5 minutes an area of rainforest the size of a foot ball field 
Is eliminated 
Women who read romance novels 
Have sex twice as often as those who don't 
Did you know? 
A can of diet coke will float in water 
While a can of regular coke will sink 
The Muppet show was banned from TV in Saudi Arabia 
Because one of its stars was a pig 
Males on average think about sex 
Every 7 seconds 
More than 50% of the people in the world have never made 
Or received a telephone call 
Syphilis has risen 500% in the last six years in London 
Why is it that everybody seems to get older? 
Except for Cliff Richard 

You can cut to the chase 
And you know its okay 
Coz we only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines 

Baby get to the point 
And quit the full play 
We only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines anyways 

1 out of 10 girls under 20 is carrying Chlamydia 
According to several sources 
Dr. Harvey Kellogg tried to make a cure for masturbation 
When he made cornflakes 
Women are 30% more active during a full moon 
Indonesia is the country with the highest scout membership 
In every single episode of Seinfeld 
There's a superman in at least one scene somewhere 
If you weighed all the animals in the world 
Hens would be 10% of the total weight 

In Minnesota there's a law 
That prevents men from having sex with living fish 
Jimmy Carter can read 2000 words per minute 
Humans and dolphins are the only species 
That has sex for pleasure 
Danny deVito is taller than Dolly Parton 

You can cut to the chase 
And you know its okay 
Coz we only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines 

In the papers on the news 
Heavens heard there's no excuse 
In formations everywhere 
All you need to know is right here 

It's possible to attend your own funeral 
Because the human brain continues to send out electrical wave signals 
For up to 37hours following death 

We only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines 

You can cut to the chase 
And you know its okay 
Coz we only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines 

Baby get to the point 
And quit the full play 
We only read the headlines 
We only read the headlines anyways