She's a total disaster in the first degree A pair of high-heeled blues waiting just for me The lights are red and the money's blue She lives down by the railroad avenue And the same old dance steps to the same old song Take a one way ride It doesn't last too long It's a lifetime sentence and no one ever gets free Because she got the diamonds And I got disease Might as well laugh 'cause you can't dance When you're on your knees Begging for mercy I can see you're havin' bad times Oooo so bad Nothing rhymes I can see you're havin' bad times Only one more line before it starts to unwind I can see you're havin' bad times So bad so bad so bad Nothing rhymes I can see you're havin' bad times She's like a lying politician at election time Front page headline and it's all bad news A stiletto-heeled version of the walking blues All fancy wrapping but nothing's inside There's no bargain prices for a downhill ride Sweet sweet poison dressed in ermine and lace And the weatherman's calling for champagne and rain Always center stage at the scene of the crime A cruel joke dressed up just like a valentine So you might as well laugh 'cause you can't dance When you're on your knees Begging for mercy I can see you're havin' bad times Oooo so bad Nothing rhymes I can see you're havin' bad times She's no misdemeanor She's a felony crime I can see you're havin' bad times Oooo so bad so bad Nothing rhymes I can see you're havin' bad times One day in her hard books is like doing bad time Funny how you always want it Just one more time When she wins That's when you lose On a good day you'll walk away Still wearing your old shoes I can see you're havin' bad times Oh so bad Nothing rhymes I can see you're havin' bad times She's all fancy wrapping but nothing's inside I can see you're havin' bad times There ain't no bargain prices for a downhill ride I can see you're havin' bad times Oooo so bad I can see you're havin' bad times She's all fancy wrapping but nothing's inside I can see you're havin' bad times Oooo so bad so bad Nothing rhymes I can see you're havin' bad times