Playing solitaire in restaurants Boundaries I'm testing em No one's really watching still I sense that I've been messing up Human but day by day I'm feeling like I'm less of one Sent all my best friends presents yet I'm disappointing everyone Got no direction someone summon nora ephron Beer pong's how I learned the capital of lebanon Basically we're lennon john, young & dead and gone Whiskey tipsy keep on slipping don't know which end of the bed I'm on Calories, valeries in malls smoking on cali weed How can you complain when you've made up all your realities? Ballerinas balancing, validating maladies Barfing up their salad greens par for mister balanchine I text a lot of boys, but I rarely fuck em Ducking clouds, breaking down, got my head up in an oven Shut my mouth, blacking out, yeah my brain is fucking bludgeoned Though I've had my doubts I know my stuff is straight disgusting And I mean that in the best way Flipping shit like burgers or fake furs or a sex change Right onto the next phase, got my buddies in the backseat Don't like what I do then get your lips up off my ass cheek Rocks in my shoes, stones in my pockets Lost and confused, cold and forgotten Yeah, that's me I try to look alive but I'm half asleep Rocks in my shoes, stones in my pockets Lost and confused, cold and forgotten Yeah, that's me I try to look alive but I'm half asleep Baby's got a nosebleed, talking to a lead pipe Strangers think they know me, photos of my best side Fit into my old jeans, haven eaten in like 3 Days you say I'm looking sick well shit you're dead right Father's vices, but my mama's heart so I've feeling like Penitent a million nights sipping on these miller lights Wishing it was back to mash & after class & pillow fights Feeling violated so I memorized the bill of rights Kids I grew up with, perspective busted & Now like half of them are fat, that's fucking justice Swear I'm on the cusp of something great, least I hope I am Trying to get a couple butts to shake til I'm broke again Compliments they're never sinking in I'm drinking gin And wondering why every night I bend over the sink again Thinking I'm in love so my irises been twinkling But he don't feel the same, guess I'm permanently single then My anxiety been fucking with me awfully Should I be taking medications, doctor probably Tummy's bum need an endoscopy Wanted everything under the sun guess I'll settle for some foster's freeze But life's gravy uh I'm trying to find a man & hop in his mercedes All my no ways been turning into maybes I thought I told you I was fucking crazy Rocks in my shoes, stones in my pockets Lost and confused, cold and forgotten Yeah, that's me I try to look alive but I'm half asleep