Brad and Suzy lived in a movie Cardboard cutout superheroes and Paragons on barstools She was a professional teller machine user He was your basic beautiful loser They had no worries all they ever had was cool And I wish that I was Brad and Suzy, I really do I wish that I was stuck on someone I wish that I was half of a two I wish that we were like that baby I wish sometimes you'd love and hate me Pa-pa-pa-pow Pa-pa-pa-pow The Sigma Chis imbibed, decried And tried to pry him from his Little Delta Tri-Omega Chi Fi Mu Hoddi Toddi A-D-Pi and Theta But she wouldn't let them Idiot 'Cause her heart was as big as the world And she was his first loving girl And he swore he'd stand by her forever And late at night, drunk on wine They'd fall in bed and intertwine And they'd make love then like nobody never And I wish that I was Brad or Suzy Pa-pa-pa-pow Pa-pa-pa-pow I wish that I was Brad or Suzy I wish that I was in a movie Brad and Suzy finally took off for the Florida Keys The better to exercise their collections of clothing by J. Crew Convertible rabbit a cooler and some coozies And six years of college course credit they'll probably neveruse But I wish that I was Brad or Suzy, I really do