Nothing stays the same forever.....not even me
Check this...check it
Something must've changed me, niggas might defame me
But things that used to taint me, no longer seem to restrain me
Strangely I'm no longer sad, mad or angry
Shame-ably it pains me, feeling like it just ain't me
Mainly what do I tell all the people that thank me
Namely those who ordain me, aside from can you blame me
Motivation the game was supplying me, it's no longer providing me
Jason Williams, something killed whatever was driving me
Worrying less about the past more about the now
Less about what I'm going though more about the how
It's for trial, it's been 30 years being fit for hurdling now
I'm a different person with nothing to overcome in the midst of burdens
For certain got 6 figures in my sock drawer
And honestly this year I expect to make a lot more
It's hard to live without a budget when life is corrupted
In a house that's so peaceful that I'm trying to disrupt it
Scream fuck it not because I have to but because I love it
Which makes me as fake as the puppets that I speak of disgusted
Without a paddle up shit's creek
Dig deep and see it ain't life it's just me
So be warned as I'm putting on like I'm reformed
Only so y'all can accept it as being my norm
Maybe I quit working on me, maybe I given up
Maybe I been lying to myself, maybe I give a fluckkk!
It's enough to make you black out, pull a mac out
Aim it at the sky while I'm running from the black cloud
Every day we playin cat and mouse as I watch it hoverin over my glass house
It's enough to make you spazz out, pull a mac out
Aim it at the sky while I'm running from a black cloud
Tired enough for me to pass out, tired of running from the black cloud.
I say it loud hoping someone can hear me clearly
Trying to make my girl get it she don't know that it's very scary
But she's a nympho, she could be barely near me
But she'll still want the God and I think she Mary Mary
The prettiest bitches just want to service me
While niggas pretty as bitches wouldn't get a word from me
Some of you haven't heard from me, some of you wouldn't mind murking me
Found that news funny likes its straight from Ron Burgundy
These niggas ain't never seen dough
They can dream though I bump into 'em in between shows
People say I'm emo, what that really mean though
Is though the song can't breathe I actually make it seem so
I've lost loved ones because they couldn't deal with me
Cherish whoever still with me though the merits been killed in me
Normally it's just me and my lonely mind
Everyone's storm is different so this forecast is only mine
Fans recognize my misery uplifted me
Shifted me to my epitome, guess the curse is a gift to me
Maybe its serendipity, maybe it's weighing on me physically
Maybe I should man up and tell God not to solicit me
Been medicated, meditated
Sedated, hated
Character assassinated, all theses years I masqueraded
Hard headed, if it was on my mind I had to say it
Tongue on the devil's pitchfork to see how disaster tasted
Rap is fabricated, rappers are so exaggerated
Wouldn't be scared of the truth if they weren't castrated
Grab a mag, spray it, surrounded by people to shoot it before me
That'll unconditionally love my beautiful ugly
Now lemme speak to who I cater to
Would you love me to sing if all my weeks were not favorable
Promised to maintain being unique but relatable
All while suffering from a disease that can do away with you
Poetry on the beat, spoken-word for the masses
Therapy over pro-tools, every word is on acid
Consonants are on Kush, every vowel is blunted
Highly wanted this whole organization privately funded
This is bigger than the eyeful, this is alert to public
Had the coppers by our tunnels and our bridges with the rifle
Sentences meant to stifle, this is a man aching
This is the dam breaking, contraband in the making
This is panic enveiling, got potential but I never met it
He be trying to come over, it seem like God won't let it
Either he never got my invite or he just dismissed it
But if all I'm hearing are the Sounds of Blackness, why am I pessimistic?
You'll never progress if you'll never try
All I ask, let every word I birth, never die
My wings spread, but when I'm at the sky
Weather didn't change like I thought and had me petrified.
It's enough to make you black out, pull a mac out
Aim it at the sky while I'm running from a black cloud
Every day we playin cat and mouse as I watch it hoverin over my glass house
It's enough to make you spazz out, pull a mac out
Aim it at the sky while I'm running from a black cloud
Tired enough for me to pass out, tired of running from the black cloud.
