giving free will, but within certain limitation. i cannot will myself to limitless mutation. i cannot know what i would be if i were not me. i can only guess me. so when i say that i know me, how can i know that? what kinda spider understands arachnophobia? i have my senses and my sense of having senses. do i got them, or they me? the weight of dust exceeds the weight of settled object. what can it mean, such gravity without a center? is there freedom to un-be? is there freedom for will to be? sheer momentum makes us act this way or that way. we just invent or just assume a motivation. i would disperse, be disconnected. is this possible? what a soldier without a _ being the air, but not be air. being the no air. being the air, but not be air. being the no air. beyond the loose neither compacted nor suspended. had i been free, i could have chosen not to be me. demented forces push me madly 'round a treadmill. demented forces push me madly 'round a treadmill.