in order, for one to metamorphasize, from one's inner self being projected out into the astral plane and to rematerialize into an inanamite object or another living organism for that matter is entirely and absolutely impossible, however if i was your tv i'd be like, look at me if i was shooting star i be like shooooom (peace) if i was a fat bitches thong i'd be like hell nah if i was a hotties thong i'd be like ahh if i was a cuss word i'd just be like, fuck if i was a rock on the moon i'd be chillin like sup if i was a butthole i'd just be an exit if i was the DOC i'd be like "man this is bull shit" if i was your tires on your car i'd be like (car noises) if i was the bumper on your car i'd be like ahh fuck if i was a balloon i'd be like (balloon losing air) if i was Alyssia Milano i'd be fucking Joe Bruce if i was a radio DJ i'd probably say, point 103 if i was a richie ass bitch i'd be like, um ok if i was spin magazine i'd put a mirror on the cover and be like fuck us and all our readers, even this mother fucker if i was your mental stress i'd be catching up if i was your headaches every now and then I'd be like thuuummmp if i was your tounge i'd be hatin' your teeth i'd be like ah why do you try to bite me every time we eat? if i was a chair i'd be like sit here and if i was kid rock i'd cut my feathered wolf hair if i was your muffler i'd be like shhh quietly if i was a price tag i'd be like you ain't buyin me if i was a fresh DJ i'd be like (scratching record) if i was jam master jay i'd be like(scratching record) if i was a cheap clock radio i'd be like (radio static) if i was barry white i'd be like what up ya'll if i was a nipple in the cold i'd be like (spring noise) if i was your dead uncle i'd be like if i was a rain drop i'd just be like (rain drop) and i had an axe and your neck i might say Chop [Chorus] If i was if i was but i'll never be (if i was if i was but i'll never be) If i was if i was but i'll never be (if i was if i was but i'll never be) If i was if i was boy your killing me (if i was if i was boy your killing me) If i was if i was but i'll never be (If i was if i was but i'll never be) If i was a faygo at one of our shows i'd fly through the air into an ocean of juggalo's if i was Andre the giant this is how i would be manly if i was father mc i'd be like yeah what happened if i was a mirror i'd find another mirror and look each other dead in the eye, crystal clear if i was a slider i'd slid out your but, i'd be floating in the toilet looking at you like what? if i was a pilot i'd be like air traffic control if i was john denver i'd be like ahhhh if i was a switch i'd be like flip me yoohoo if i was a london cop car i'd be like (siren) if i was chewbacca i'd get me a fresh ass fade if i was vanilla ice i'd be like fuck yall i'm still paid if i was a stop sign i'd just be like stop if i was your wooden leg i'd still be giving you the hip hop [Chorus 2x]