I’ve wined and dined on mulligan stew And never wished for turkey As I hitched and hiked and grifted too From Maine to Albuquerque Alas, I missed the Beaux-Arts Ball and, what is twice as sad,, I was never at a party Where they honored Noel Caaahd social circles spin too fast for me My Hobo-hemia is the place to be I get too hungry for dinner at eight I love the theater but never come late I never bother with people I hate That’s why the lady is a tramp I don’t like crap games with barons and earls Won’t go to Harlem in ermine and pearls Won’t dish the dirt with the rest of the girls That’s why the lady is a tramp I like the free, fresh wind in my hair Life without care, I’m broke, it’s oke Hate California, it’s cold and it’s damp That’s why the lady is a tramp I go to Coney, the beach is divine I go to ball games, the bleachers are fine I follow Winchell and read every line That’s why the lady is a tramp I like a prizefight that isn’t a fake I love the rowing on Central Park Lake I go to opera and stay wide awake That’s why the lady is a tramp I like the green grass under my shoes What can I lose?, I’m flat, that’s that I’m all alone when I lower my lamp That’s why the lady is a tram, Don’t know the reason for cocktails at five I don’t like flying, I’m glad I’m alive I crave affection, but not when I drive That’s why the lady is a tramp Folks went to London and left me behind I missed the crowning, Queen Mary didn’t mind Won’t play Scarlett in Gone with the Wynde That’s why the lady is a tramp I like to hang my hat where I please Sail with the breeze, No dough, hi-ho! I still like Roosevelt, I think he’s a champ That’s why the lady, That’s why the lady That’s why the lady is a tramp