I'm a lonesome schoolboy and I just came into town I'm a lonesome schoolboy and I just came into town Well, I heard so much about London I decided to check it out I wait in Leicester Square with a come-hither look in my eye And I'm leaning on Nelson's Column but all I do is talk to the lime Where do I get my cock sucked? Where do I get my ass fucked? I ain't got no money, but I know where to put it every time Well, I asked a young policeman if he'd only lock me up for the night And I got pigs in the farmyard, some of them, some of them, they're alright Well, he fucked me with his truncheon and his helmet was way too tight Where do I get my cock sucked? Where do I get my ass fucked? I ain't got no money, but I know where to put it every time I'm a lonesome schoolboy from the other side of town