Tom: F# G Hohohoho C G D G Riff 1: E|----3-X-3-X-3-X-3------| B|----3-X-3-X-3-X-3------| G|----4-X-4-X-4-X-4------| D|----5-X-5-X-5-X-5------| A|----5-X-5-X-5-X-5------| E|----3-X-3-X-3-X-3------| Riff 2: E|--------------| B|--------------| G|--------------| D|--------------| A|--3-3-2-0-----| E|----------3---| Riff 3: E|--------------| B|--------------| G|--------------| D|--------------| A|--0-2-3-------| E|--------------| (riff 1) durante a musica e em outros acordes G (riff 2) G There ain't nothing more depressing then a pine tree, G (riff 2) G Gussied up with candie canes and balls G Those carolers kept me up for hours A D (riff 2) It's merry christmas seeping through my walls G C D G No i'm not wicking calmy nut or nothing G C But there is one damn holiday that i can't stand C G/B G Em It ain't halloween or thanksgiving or even april fools A D G But it will sure make a fool outta every man C D G Ha! C If i ain't drunk then it ain't christmas G C D You know where to stick those jingle bells G D If i ain't hammerd it ain't hanukkah G C D Then all you motherfuckers go to hell G C If i ain't cocked then it ain't kwanzaa G C D Joy to the world and jacking coats G D If i ain't drunk then it ain't christmas C (pausa) If i ain't anything but broke ( G D G ) E|-----------------| B|---3-3-1-0-------| G|-----------0-----| D|-----------------| A|-----------------| E|-----------------| (Riff 1) G C D G Now every year the malls are just a madhouse G C D G Full of empty pocket stops and smiles C G Em Just the smell of eggnog makes me vomit A D (riff 2) And those colored lights are fucking infintiel G C D G I think we, collectivley as people G (riff 3) C Should rise against this coorperate jolly noise C G/B G Em And tell the world, let's buy some peace and quite for a change A D G Before we spend it all on fucking toys C D G Ha! (pausa) C So, If i ain't drunk then it aint christmas G C D You know where to stick those jingle bells G D If i aint hammerd it aint hanukkah C (pausa) G C D Fa lalalala go fuck yourself! G C If i ain't cocked then it ain't kwanzaa G C D Joy to the world and gettin' stoned G D If i ain't drunk then it ain't christmas C (deixe soar) G So leave these god damn screws the fuck alone! ( G D G G/F# G ) E|------------------| B|---3-3-1-0--------| G|-----------0---0--| D|-------------4----| A|------------------| E|------------------| Merry fucking christmas! Hi simon!