Uh, the Infamous P.A.M. Slanging candy canes out the suburbs Lock up your sons and cubbards The chubby wonders pluggin up your chimney You scrooge, you lose Check it MERRY X-X-X-L MAS THE HOTTEST HOSTEST WITH THE MOSTEST HOSTEST CUP CAKES YES THEY CALL ME CHUNKY PAM CHUNKY PAM I AM THEY CALL ME CHUNKY PAM CHUNKY PAM I AM I'M GIGANTA BIGGER THAN SANTA SING THE ANTHEM FROM ALASKA TO ATLANTA HOW THEY LOVE THE LOVE HANDLES OF CHUNKY PAM CHUNKY PAM I AM THEY CALL ME CHUNKY PAM CHUNKY PAM I AM I been dreaming of a white Christmas, A Tight Christmas Pamalicious chicken bling glistnin The Ice Princess I got Dreams of Delicious dishes With all the finest fixings Saint Nicholas' mistress Spitting my wish list gimme Chicken breasts, baby back ribs, roast beef and brisket Buffalo wings, ring dings, twizzlers and biscuits Jumbo Shrimp and turkey parents crib in jersey beneath the missile toe I prefer my kisses Hershey Serve me that Kit kat Before I gift-wrap a bitchslap I don't count carbs, I'm counting green backs His face lit up like Rudolph When I took my sweat suit off I sat on santa's lap, they call me nut cracker sweet booty The Figgy pudding grinch is stacked and she ain't takin sh### You twiggy bitches piggy back shake off like bacon bits Pimpin since Tiny Tim wore Tiny Timberlands My dinner spins on platinum plates their made of shiny rims Feast your eyes I'm bringing sexy back with Christmas cheer You anorexics all can eat me at this time of year Pop more cris than cringle Pop more chips than Pringles Tiss the season when I trim the tree with hit singles PAM DECKS THE HALLS LIKE A MAD JOHN OATS THE MANEATER DRINKIN EGGNOG IN MY WHITE MINK COAT CALL ME CHUNKY PAM CHUNKY PAM I AM THEY CALL ME CHUNKY PAM CHUNKY PAM I AM ROCK THE BELLS OFF YR TOBOGGEN KNOCK THE STUFFING OUT YR STOCKING WHILE YOU'RE DROOLING BY THE YUELOG EVERYBODY NOD YOUR NOGGINS TO CHUNKY PAM CHUNKY PAM I AM THEY CALL ME CHUNKY PAM CHUNKY PAM I AM