Tom: C From: * (Adam Schneider) Subject: /l/christine_lavin/* "REGRETTING WHAT I SAID TO YOU WHEN YOU CALLED ME 11:00 ON A FRIDAY MORNING TO TELL ME THAT AT 1:00 FRIDAY AFTERNOON YOU WERE GONNA LEAVE YOUR OFFICE, GO DOWNSTAIRS, HAIL A CAB TO GO OUT TO THE AIRPORT TO CATCH A PLANE TO GO SKIING IN THE ALPS FOR TWO WEEKS; NOT THAT I WANTED TO GO WITH YOU, I WASN'T ABLE TO LEAVE TOWN, I'M NOT A VERY GOOD SKIER, I COULDN'T EXPECTYOU TO PAY MY WAY, BUT AFTER GOING OUT WITH YOU FOR THREE YEARS, I DON'T LIKE SURPRISES: A MUSICAL APOLOGY" ------------------------------------------------------------------ [Yes, that's really the title of the song.] [Actually in F; capo 5.] [Use the tablature at the end of this file for chord fingerings and picking pattern.] [spoken:] In this song, I attempt to take back everything I said while standing in a phone booth on the corner of 49th and 3rd. [Intro: arpeggio C chord.] C E Am Am/G I didn't mean it when I said I hope the cable in the elevator Fmaj7 Fmaj7 C G snaps when you step on board E E Am Am And I was joking when I said I hope you crack your head And get mangled by the downstairs revolving door C E Am Am/G And I was kidding when I said I hope the number 103 bus F F C G Hits and makes a pancake out of you Am Am E E I'm sorry, I'm sorry F G C G Isn't it amazing what a woman in love will do? And I don't really want to see your taxi on the 59th street bridge Flip over and crash through the rail And I'd feel bad if at the airport you were mistaken for a local sex offender Arrested, beaten up, and thrown in jail And I really don't want to see you getting radiation poisoning from the metal detector That all passengers on foreign and domestic flights must walk through I'm sorry, forgive me For all the mean things I said to you E E Am Am You thought I didn't have a temper E E Am Am Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, surprise E E Am Am But I really don't want to see you dismembered by the marijuana- sniffing dogs When a simple little nipping would suffice, would suffice And I'm sorry that I said I hope the plane explodes in mid-air As it carries you away from me And I'm sorry that I said I hope you break both legs On the mountain while you ski And I'm sorry for all the nasty things I said about your mother Even though we both know they're true Am Am E E I'm sorry, forgive me Am Am E E I'm swallowing my pride, I'd feel so guilty if you died Oh I'm sorry, but I'm still mad at you. TAB: [This tablature isn't _exactly_ what Christine plays in any particular verse; it's a combination of what I thought were the best-sounding parts from all the verses.] C E Am Am/G E ------0---------|------0---------|------0---------|------0---------| B 1---------1-----|0---------0-----|1---------1-----|1---------------| G ----------------|----------------|----------------|----------2-----| D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------0---| A 3-------3-------|--------2-------|0-------0-------|----------------| E ----------------|0---------------|----------------|3-------3-------| ...mean it when I said I hope the cable in the elevator Fmaj7 Fmaj7 C G E ----------------|------0---------|------0---------|------3---------| B 1---------1-----|--1-------1-----|--1-------1-----|0---------0-----| G ------2---------|--------------2-|--------------0-|----------------| D ----3-------3---|----3-------3---|----2-------0---|----0-------3---| A --------3-------|--------3-------|3-------3-------|----------------| E 1---------------|1---------------|----------------|3-------3-------| snaps when you step on board; And I was E E Am Am E ----------------|------0---------|----------------|----------------| B --0-------0-----|--0-------0-----|--1-------0-----|0=1-------0-----| G ------1-------1-|--------------1-|------2---------|------2---------| D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------0---| A --------2-------|--------2-------|0-------0-------|0-------0-------| E 0---------------|0---------------|----------------|----------------| joking when I said I hope you crack your head and get D/A D/A G Gsus G5 E ------2---------|2---------------|----------------|----------------| B 3---------------|------3---------|--0-------1-----|3---------------| G ----------2-----|----------2-----|------0-------0-|0---------------| D ----0-------0---|----0-------0---|----0-------0---|0---------------| A 0-------0-------|0-------0-------|----------------|----------------| E ----------------|----------------|3-------3-------|3---------------| mangled by the downstairs revolving door; And I was C E Am Am/G E ------0---------|------0---------|------0---------|------0---------| B 1---------1-----|0---------0-----|1---------1-----|--1-------1-----| G ----------------|----------------|----------------|----------------| D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------0---| A 3-------3-------|--------2-------|0------(0)------|----------------| E ----------------|0---------------|----------------|3------(3)------| kidding when I said I hope the number 1 - 0 - 3 bus F C G E ----1-----------|----------------|----------------|------3---------| B 1---1-----------|----------------|--1-------1-----|0---------0-----| G ----2-----------|----------------|------0-------0-|----------------| D ----3-----------|----------------|----2-------2---|----0-------0---| A ----3-----------|----------------|3-------3-------|----------------| E 1---1-----------|----------------|----------------|3------(3)------| hits and makes a pancake out of you; Am Am E E E ----------------|----------------|--------------0-|----------------| B --1-------1-----|0=1-------1-----|--0-------0-----|--0-------0-----| G ------2-------2-|------2-------2-|------1---------|------1-------1-| D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---| A 0-------0-------|0-------0-------|--------2-------|--------2-------| E ----------------|----------------|0---------------|0---------------| I'm sorry; Forgive me; Isn't it F G C G E ----------------|----------------|----------------|------3---------| B --1-------1-----|--0-------0-----|--1-------1-----|--0-------0-----| G ------2-------0-|------0-------0-|------0-------0-|----------------| D ----3-------3---|----0-------0---|----2-------2---|----0-------0---| A --------3-------|----------------|3-------3-------|--------0-------| E 1---------------|3-------3-------|----------------|3---------------| amazing what a woman in love will do? E E Am Am E 0---------------|----------------|--------------0-|----------------| B 0---------------|----------------|--1-------1-----|--1-------------| G 1---------------|----------------|------2---------|------2---------| D 2---------------|----------------|----2-------2---|----2-------2---| A 2---------------|----------------|0-------0-------|0-------0-------| E 0---------------|----------------|----------------|----------------| You thought I didn't have a temper; Ha E E Am Am E ----------------|------0---------|--------------0-|----------------| B ----------0-----|--0-------0-----|--1------(1)----|----------------| G ------1-------1-|----------------|------2---------|------2---2-----| D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---| A --------2-------|--------2-------|0-------0-------|0------(0)------| E 0---------------|0---------------|----------------|----------------| ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, surprise! But I E E Am Am E ----------------|----------------|----------------|----------------| B --0-----------0-|--0-------0-----|--1-------1-----|--1-------1-----| G ------1---2-----|------1-------1-|------2-------2-|------2---------| D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------0---| A --------2-------|--------2-------|0-------0-------|0-------0-------| E 0---------------|0---------------|----------------|----------------| really don't want to see you dismembered by the marijuana-sniffing dogs D/A D/A G Gsus G5 E ----------------|----------------|----------------|----------------| B 3---------3-----|--3-------3-----|0-------1-------|3---------------| G ------2---------|------2---------|0-------0-------|0---------------| D ----0-------0---|----0-------0---|----0-------0---|0---------------| A 0-------0-------|0-------0-------|[*|----------------| E ----------------|----------------|3-------3-------|3---------------| when a simple little nipping would suffice, would suffice - Adam Schneider, *