Tom: G
[Intro] B A E
B
Way back when
I was just ten
Simple and sweet
A
Everywhere
Fellas would stare
E
Out on the street
C#m
And I felt used
B
Kinda confused
E A
I would refuse to look in their eyes
C#m F#
But now I really love creepy old guys!
We all do!
B
Gum disease
Skin like grilled cheese
Saggy old asses!
Saggy old asses!
A
It's cute and vile
Hey baby, smile!
E
To each girl that passes!
(Wolf-whistling)
C#m
They make me blush!
B
Can't get enough!
E A
Now one of 'em loves me, wants to be mine!
B
That's right!
C# F# B
Marrying my own creepy old guy!
I'm a creepy old guy!
F#
My creepy old guy, my creepy old guy
E B
I'm so happy I could cry!
D#m E C# F#
Girls may seem disgusted, but we're actually just shy!
A
My creepy old groom!
Creepy old groom!
G G#m
Play that wedding tune
Bm C#
Hey folks, step aside!
I am older, but I'm glad I waited!
F#
'Cuz here comes the bride!
B
I am marrying my creepy old guy
D A E
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy, creepy old guy
B
My creepy old guy!
D A G
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy, creepy old guy!
C
Fix his hair
Get him prepared
For Armageddon
Bb
Sure, the groom
Crawled out of a tomb
F
But hey, hey, it's a wedding!
Dm
So dim the lights
C
Pick up some rice
F
Say something nice!
Bb
It's my day to shine
D G C
I'm getting hitched to my creepy old guy!
It's showtime!
G
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy
F C
She's marrying a creepy old guy!
Em F
Have you guys seen Lolita?
D G
This is just like that, but fine!
Bb F
Creepy old dude, creepy old dude
G# Am
Our faith has been renewed
Dm D
Now love is alive!
F C
Wave your baby girl goodbye
F C
I am walking down the aisle
Dm C Dm C
I wanna see a tear in every eye as I pass by
F Am
I know that on the outside he's disgusting
F Bb
And even on the inside, he's disgusting
C# C
But I know that this time, I'm makin' it right
Making it right, making it right!
F
With my family by my side
B
O-M-G
Bm
Dressed to a T
B
Fancy and formal
A
I found me a wife
L'chaim! To life!
E
This is so normal!
C#m
I was ignored
B
But now, I'm adored!
E A
'Cause I extorted, tortured, and lied
C# F# B
Give it up for my underage bride!
F#
Here comes the bride
Here comes the bride
E
God be glorified!
F#
I can't believe some cultures think this kind of thing's alright
A
My creepy old guy
G#m
My creepy old guy
G G#m F# C#m
Doesn't he deserve a chance at life?
C#
oh, yeah, that's right!
Yeah, that's right!
F#
Let's make him alive!
F#
I am marrying my creepy old guy!
Bm B Bm B
Guy, guy, guy, creepy old guy, guy, guy, creepy old guy!
E
Guy, guy!
F#
I have chills!
B
Yeeeeeeeeah!
