Taylor:
Once upon a time, before I was insane
I dated this Disney guy, Joe Jonas was his name.
But he broke up with me
Joe:
You're just way too creepy! Plus I found someone else, his name's Mickey. (HO HO!)
Taylor:
So I wrote a song about this stupid ass,
Then found this guy named John, but that was over fast.
If you don't marry me, I will pull all your teeth!
John:
You're totally crazy!
Taylor:
No!
John:
Yes!
Taylor:
No!
John:
Yes!
Taylor:
Maybe! Hahahaha!
He hit me with his guitar, and he said that
John:
We are through!
Taylor:
Just you wait
Until I write a song about you!
Then I met that Jake Gyllenhal dick
And was obsessed right away
Jake:
You send me 1000 messages... and that's just from today!
Taylor:
Oh, that's because I'm having your baby
Jake:
What? But you don't even put out
Taylor:
Stop questioning me, Jake
Or I'll put you 6 feet underground!
Jake:
Whoa! Whoa! Phsyco, phsyco, phsyco!
Taylor:
Fine, go!
It's good material
Next came Kennedy
I think he was 15
I bought the house next door to watch you constantly
And also to make sure you never ever cheat
Kennedy:
OMG we are done! You are scary.
Taylor:
Harry was my last, that One Direction freak.
I taped him to my wall, so he could never leave.
Harry:
Someone call the police!
You're insane, we are trough!
Taylor:
You're just like all the rest
What did I do to you?
So I used my stalker app
To track down all of those pricks!
The next song I'll write I'll use their blood as my ink! (hey!)
Jake:
Holy crap, that nut job just bursted in!
Ex-boyfriends:
Whoah!
Taylor:
What the hell is this?
Ex-boyfriends:
It's a support group for all the men who wrote songs about you, bitch!
Taylor:
What? I have not written about Harry yet
Harry:
I am just planning ahead.
John:
Why are you even here anyway?
Taylor:
To finish you all off with my pen!
Ex-Boyfriends:
No! No! Devil, devil, devil
Taylor:]
Oh! Oh, it's true, I'm the devil!
Doctor:
Ok, that's enough
You were right, she's nuts
You are coming with us!
Taylor:
What? Wait, get out of me, I'm not crazy! Whoaaah!
Ex-boyfriends:
It worked!
This was all a trick, we knew you would come
So, we hired this doctor
Doctor:
You're going to an insane asylum
based on the behavior I observed
Taylor:]
OH! OH! Let me go, you assholes!
Assholes:
No! No
Doctor:
Welcome to your new home
Mickey:
Ha ha, so you're crazy too, huh?
