Hey Where's the fire, son? What the- Oh no Where you off to? Just this party in the garden Nice! How 'bout I join you? How about you don't? Hmm? Son? Come back Hey! B- U- I told you to stop! Hmm Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm Now that's a fire! Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm Listen, son Knock you in your head with my stick With my stick You gon' have a mark from my stick From my stick My stick, my stick My stick is better than bacon Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm You can't touch my stick I don't wanna! Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm Yeah, you want my stick Thunk your coconut with my stick Look at my stick (mm-hmm) You gon' feel the wrath of my stick Fear my stick! My stick, my stick My stick is better than bacon Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm You can't touch my stick But it's just a stick! Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm It's my perfect stick My stick is my friend born from a log Everyone can see it's better than bacon Why'd you get so crotchety and mean? Look at my stick Why'd you drink that creature's milk? It's green! Got me sick! My stick (my stick), my stick (my stick) My stick is better than bacon Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm You can't touch my stick But it's just a stick! Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm Don't you like my stick? No, it's just a stick! Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm It's my perfect stick My stick and me take walks every day Past the hooligans down by the ocean When they laugh at my stick, then they learn How my stick is much denser than bacon Bought a little piggy and I let the little piggy run amok (so cute) But when I would sleep, little piggy kept wakin' me up (sold him) People often fight about which birds are the best birds (do they?) But everybody can agree that seagulls are the worst I kiss my stick, it's my stick You can't pick up my stick Keep your mitts off my stick I disappear for years then reappear Right here to cheer about my cool stick When I was a little bitty kid Little bitty kid I had not yet found my mighty stick Then I did! Mm-hmm I could break your stick usin' just my brain My stick?! I could make you wish you couldn't feel pain Not my stick! Hmm-mm My stick (my stick), my stick (my stick) My stick is better than bacon! Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm You can't touch my stick I don't want your stick! Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm Yeah, you want my stick I mean, it's just a stick! Mmm-ah-ha-ha-hmm It's my big boy stick Bought a bag of venom and I wish I really, really, really didn't (it turns out) Nobody has a good reason to own a bag of venom (it's poison) Poke on my bruise sometimes 'cause I like how it hurts (it hurts good) Everybody can agree that seagulls are the worst (worst, worst, worst, worst) I kiss my stick, it's my stick You can't pick up my stick Keep your mitts off my stick Everyone can see it's better than bacon I kiss my stick, it's my stick My stick is my friend born from a log You can't pick up my stick Keep your mitts off my stick Everyone can see it's better than bacon