If you were a DJ you would If you were a DJ you would If you were a DJ you would gimme a beat If you were a DJ you would gimme a beat And if you were a bus rider you'd give me your seat If you were Jack Horner, I'd be blueberry pie And if you were my dealer you would just get me high But as it stands you're nobody, you're just like a ghost Gimme headaches, gimme phantom pains—I loved you the most So love me or leave me, but don't be so mysteezie I don't care how you get here won't you please just come and see me Bus rider! You're too broke to drive Bus rider! I'll make you mine [x2] If you were a bank account you'd be overdrawn You grew up in the projects with your little single mom And now your ass has got no wheels, you're down on your luck But f*ck the Number 9, I'm comin' to pick you up Bus rider! You're too broke to drive Bus rider! I'll make you mine [x2] Gimme some play Don't throw me no shade Je suis enchanté (hey) Je suis enchanté (hey) [x2] If you were a D If you were a D If you were a DJ you would gimme a beat Bus rider! You're too broke to drive Bus rider! I'll make you mine [x2] If you were adventurous you'd gimme some jam And spread it on my peanut butter here in Japan Take me to Tokyo! Tune in my radio! Be my Romeo on my s-s-s-stereo, s-s-s-stereo, s-s-s-stereo Stereo (stereo?) You're too broke to drive I'll make you mine [x2] Bus rider! You're too broke to drive Bus rider! I'll make you mine [x2]