(The Story of Z.
A fictional story
Set within the historic context of
Numbers 21: 4-9)
I'm so far away, I'm so far away
I'm so far away
The distance means the world to me
Another lie and no one knows
Something dark inside me grows
It bothers me less and less each time
I've stopped asking if I've crossed a line
Each transgression and every sin
Brings a bald change within
I'm not really sure who I am and I can't re-begin
Don't get me wrong
I'm glad to have been set free
I've never been so scared in all my life
With the enemy on one side
The other side the sea
I told myself: It's all over tonight
Between me and being free it was a great chasm
And I had no way to get across
Then the waters were parted and dry land did appear
And I began to believe that God does hear
The Chariots followed racing behind
But as the last of us stepped from the domain of the sea
The waters collapsed on the persuing foe
And we sang out with joy being free and alone
I was cheered but still quite a bit shaken
Now free, would I miss what I've forsaken
What will lie before if I follow on this way
There's no other choice, no other choice
So I guess it doesn't matter any way
The Chariots followed racing behind
But as the last of us stepped from the domain of the sea
The waters collapsed on the persuing foe
And we sang out with joy being free and alone
I'm so far away
I'm so far away
How can you all follow so freely?
And eat this bread each day and evening?
Though the taskmasters are gone
Are we free, really free at all?
With these laws that it seems so hard to keep?
Have we been set free to die?
In the desert with the sun burning high?
Glad to leave bondage behind
Still, at least, I had some good times
In Egypt, and a roof and a bed at night
Behold the kindness and severity of God
After seeing what I've seen
Is it wise complain?
Behold the kindness and severity of God
If I'm less then greatful that He saved me
Would he cause me pain?
Our leader seems to think it's fine
That we're being deprived of meat and wine
Bread and water is our meal
Desert sands fill our heals
And I can't stop thinking that the promised land
Is what we left behind
Behold the kindness and severity of God
After seeing what I've seen
Is it wise complain?
Behold the kindness and severity of God
If I'm less then greatful that He saved me
Would he cause me pain?
Oh sweet longing!
The captivating dream
The precious chains of wanting
That wrap themselves around me
Oh sweet longing!
A hope that is a feeling
An end in itself
Yet a road without an end
Are the things which seem to have
The strongest draws upon us
The things we really want
Or really need
Are we seeking some fulfillment
Once and for all completing
Now and forever salving
All complications of our being
Oh sweet longing!
The captivating dream
The precious chains of wanting
That wrap themselves around me
Oh sweet longing!
A hope that is a feeling
An end in itself
Yet a road without an end
Oh sweet longing!
The captivating dream
The precious chains of wanting
That wrap themselves around me
Oh sweet longing!
A hope that is a feeling
An end in itself
Yet a road without an end
Oh sweet longing!
The captivating dream
The precious chains of wanting
That wrap themselves around me
Oh sweet longing!
A hope that is a feeling
An end in itself
Yet a road without an end
Oh sweet longing!
The captivating dream
The precious chains of wanting
That wrap themselves around me
Oh sweet longing!
A hope that is a feeling
An end in itself
Yet a road without an end
(So have the thoughts and words of Z been up until now
And he has not been alone in seeing things this way
Now he finds fiery serpents are upon them, and -
At least initially - wrongly attributes this to the workings
The false gods of Egypt)
Are the gods of Egypt upon us once again?
Typhon sends his children across the burning sands
Danger standing still, worse to try and run
One hiss
One kiss
One less
Son of man.
(Z's son seeks him out and finds him in his tent)
I push my way into the tent
Stare into the eyes of death
My father's lying on a pallet
Struggling for his breath
He pushes up onto one arm
He looks at me and says
Son! Save my life! Give me any message of hope!
Darkness like poison courses through my veins
Father, I cry, come out with me
To see the wanders of the dunes
Our leader's lifted up a serpent that heals with just one look
Believe, and be made whale
Son! Hold your tongue! Do you take me for a fool?
A serpent!
Don't mock me
Or minimize my pains
I can't believe you're doubting me, my father
Would I ever serve you wrong?
I've seen the wonder with my own eyes
I've seen the dead brought back to life
What's the cost to cast a glance?
Life over death
Son! Lay me down! Perhaps I don't deserve to live
Leave me
Help others
Who need it more than I
And the Lord says
When an evil spirit comes out of a man
It goes through arid places seeking rest
But it does not find it
Then it says
I will return to the house I left
When it arrives
It finds the house
Swept clean and put in order
Then goes and it takes
Seven spirits more wicked than itself
And they go in and live there
And the final condition of that man
Is worse than the first
Since we fled from pharaoh leaving Egypt behind
We've wandered through the desert seeking rest
But we have not found it
So we said
Better to return to the land we left
Than to perish
Than to languish
Where the sun steals the water
Taking matters in to our hands
We built the golden calf
For ourselves
And we went in and worshipped
And the final condition of generation
Is to sleep beneath the sand
Till the raising of the dead
We will worship the Lord who told Moses to put up the serpent
We will worship the Lord who told Moses to put up the serpent
We will worship Moses who put up the serpent
We will worship the serpent
In the heat of the desert the coldness came
Upon the body of Z
Though the serpent did pass him by
He never lifted his eyes to see
I'm so far away
I'm so far away
And I loved him like a son loves a father
And I loved him like a daughter loves a mother
And I am broken like a jar that can't hold water
And I am broken, and I cannot bear the thought
It was not as though he lacked the strength to lift his gaze
He went out of his way to look away
And the stubborness that brought him to his own demise
Just makes me feel so sick inside, sick inside, sick inside
So sick inside
